“Knowing what you feel is not enough; you must express it and express it appropriately.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“What you do influences who you are and how you feel about yourself.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“If you change one behavior you change a whole series of related behavior.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“If you have doubts whether a specific act was assertive ask yourself whether it increase your self-respect even slightly. If it did, it was assertive. If not, it was unassertive.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“The act of selecting a goal says ‘This is me. That is what I want’. The act of moving towards a goal requires an active orientation mastery of life situations and self. More personal goals demand open communication with others. The extent to which you assert yourself determines the level of your self-esteem.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“You’re so caught up in the need for being liked that you sacrifice your own self-respect.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Inadequate behavior in one area has repercussions in your psychological organization brining about additional anxiety, tension or depression and influencing your feeling of confidence in other situations is called neurotic spiral.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“You’ve confused the goal of being liked with the goal of being respected.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Through ignorance of fear, many people do not create any action plans for their own lives.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“You must recognize your rights and stand up for them. If you do not, other people define your role for you and you stop being yourself.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Aggression is an act against others. Assertion is appropriate standing up for yourself.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Don’t confuse glib, manipulating behavior with true assertion.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“You can modify, control and change your own behavior.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Without a specific statement of intention, it becomes easy to fool yourself into believing you have carried out a vow.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Write down the intention so you cannot change it inadvertently.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Ignore the behavior and you encourage the other person to continue the pattern.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Women particularly want to stand up for themselves but they have been brainwashed by society to think that if they make demands, ask for raises, push for promotions, it will be masculine or castrating.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
“Recognize the other people have feelings too. All the reactions do not center around you. They are independent of you and possess their own thoughts, feelings and problems.” ~~ Herbert Fensterheim- Jean Baer (Book: Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No)
Bonus Quote I Found In The Book:
“Let us think of life as a process of choices, one
after another. At each point, there is a progression choice and regression
choice. There may be a movement towards defense, towards safety, toward being
afraid; but over the other side, there is the growth choice.” ~~ Abraham H. Maslow
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Hope you enjoyed reading this collection of
quotes.
